Raised through fear: how it still shapes you today

Punishment, threats or shaming instead of explanations? How a fear-based upbringing can still affect you, questions to reflect on and where coaching fits.

Family and the people around you

You grew up with punishment, threats or shaming rather than explanations. Today you notice how that shapes the way you deal with mistakes, authority or yourself.

How it can show up

You are more afraid of mistakes than of doing nothing.
With managers or teachers you quickly go quiet or tense.
When criticised, you expect a punishment.
You find it hard to ask for help.

Questions for you

There are no right answers. Take the question that stays with you.

How do you deal with your own mistakes today?
Which rules from the past still apply to you even though you no longer need them?
Who treats you with understanding today, and how does that feel?
What would you like to pass on differently from how you experienced it?

Where coaching can help

Coaching can help you recognise patterns today, for example with managers or with mistakes, and try out new ways of acting.

When other help fits better

If you experienced violence or the memories weigh heavily on you, working with a psychotherapist is the right place to work through it.

If it is too much right now

Coaching is not psychotherapy and not a crisis service. If you are in danger or thinking about harming yourself, contact the emergency services where you are right away, or a crisis service near you.

Want to talk it through?

In a free 20-minute intro call we look at whether coaching is the right way to work on this for you. If it is not, I will tell you so.

Book an intro call